I've been silent all of this while, shouldn't it come to a time when I must tell all, as I have promised? To tell all and not let anything go, to bleed away everything that pains me so....all that I've endured, and all the more for everything that I cared about.

I know, I've been a walling up so many things inside, so much so that I felt like I could burst or fall apart. Telling it all like a story is the answer, but somehow I felt that it's not the right time to do so yet.

If I fall, let me fall. I am not infallible, I am not what they think I am, I am nothing like what they would have liked at all. In short, I am weak.

I would love, and yet it is so far away. All I could feel when I could feel then was the coldness, and that was immense and heavy.

Would you have believed me if I had told you, that it is real, as real as can be, and it is nothing that could be denied by mere words alone?

How I wish I could feel, and not let it turn so distant.

But nevertheless, by steel or by blood, or by whatever means that I have, I'll endure.

June then, I think, at the very least.

Labels: Silence